the story of why i don’t like mice and have neutral feelings about centipedes
things I did say: “a mice ate my pants”
things I did not say “mice ate my pants” or “a mouse ate my pants”
things that actually happened: I lived in a room in a building right next to the woods for a week this summer and two mice decided that I was lonely and they needed to keep me company, and by “keep me company” they actually meant that they needed to chew holes in all my stuff. Which is why I have a hole in a pair of my shorts and one of my staff t-shirts. It is also the reason that I did not have a toothbrush for that week of camp, because guess what, mice like toothbrushes too. apparently. and tootsie-roll pops. But I’ll give them that one because those are actually food (kind of).
so then the maintenance people put traps in my room and I came back to my room late at night and was going to go to bed, but then I noticed that there was a dead mouse in the corner of my room. And I don’t really like dead things, so I grabbed some clothes and went to go bunk with my seeeester in her house for the night. And then I was putting on my clothes the next day and I put on my shorts and they had a hole in them that was chewed by the ex-mouse. And then I went back to my room to get other non-eaten pants, and there was ANOTHER dead mouse in the other corner in my room. and then i screamed a little and one of my co-workers was brave and awesome and volunteered to get rid of them for me. And then I moved out of that room.
And that is why i don’t like mice and have neutral feelings about centipedes. because centipedes did not try to eat my pants.